Friday Links

Here are some amazoballs links I have encountered in the last week. If you haven't seen them already, go see them. Your amusement level will definitely increase.

1. Things That Blew Your Mind When You Were A Kid

2. Worst Movie Death Scene

3. Star Wars Crawl Creator

4. The Best Delhi definitions, ever (Sample: Vree verb. Feel anxious, worry. Example: "Oi, koi nahin pakdega (nobody will catch us). Daunt vree so much!")

5. The Cast Of “Full House” Reunited (Except the Olsen twins. Sad.)

6. Tunak Tunak Tun Meets Metal

7. Hilarious Medical Miracle (feat. A dead Mithun, his brain and a lesbian Madhoo)

8. One of xkcd's best and brilliant time wasters

9. A firangi's commendable take on Sunny Paji's 'TAREEKH PE TAREEKH!'

10. The Curious Case of Uday Chopra

And that's it! Hope you've enjoyed this week's edition of linkages. 

See you next Friday with more time wasters!

Fuck Me Sideways

The human condition is one that I will never be able to understand. I have tried, several times, but I have sadly been quite unsuccessful in my understanding. This is not to say that I am above human, a demi-God like figure sent to this planet to understand the ways of the homo sapiens.

Though that would have been mighty sweet. And a potential plot for a blockbuster Hollywood movie (I'd like to think).

Simplicity, as a type of behaviour, is lost somewhere. The same can be said about consistency. You may argue that no person can have a consistent behaviour, there are often mood swings. That is true, but there is also a simplicity attached to those who are moody and have strange behavioral patterns. You expect them to act crazy one day, and normal and chirpy on the other.

What about those who you think you have figured out, and BAM they bitchslap you out of nowhere? What about those you thought have pretty consistent behaviour and BAM, they snap at you?

The bottomline is BAM. I will never understand people.

Dogs, on the other hand, are pretty cool customers. I wish people were more like dogs. I'd understand them so well then.

Or maybe wish I were a dog. I'd much rather spend my life sniffing dog butts, chasing my tail and eating my own poop than to try to figure out a person's personality.

Maybe I could. But then you'd just call me crazy.

   

The Little Things

It's 2:00 am in the morning, and I cannot find sleep. Instead, I find an all consuming rage and a hint of self loathing.

There are some who quite enjoy this state. These are also those people who constantly complain all the time. I am not one of those people.

I am also not a perfectionist. I'd like to think I try, but that might come off as a lie.

What I would really like is the life of a snail. Sometimes I liken myself to one. And I even make up for the lack of shell by constructing an imaginary one all around myself. I retract in this shell quite often. No one else is allowed in.

Routine sickens me. I find no joy in the usual. Is life really the same thing over and over again? Since when did we get stuck in this infinite loop of sorrow and misery?

I also hate when people have very utopian ideas about reality. Such people romanticize even the mundane. That, to me, is one of the most difficult things to accept.

What is to become of me? Where am I going? Am I even going anywhere?

Questions. Questions. Questions. Instead of finding the answers, sleep finds me.

Good night.

18 Things I Want

I have to tell you this. My current obsession on the internet is this amazing website called Thought Catalog. If you haven't visited the website, quickly do so. And bookmark it too. It features some very insightful, silly and  inspirational articles I have read in a while.

Recently, I came across this article on Thought Catalog called 18 Things I Want by Gaby Dunn. I liked the article, and it inspired me to write something similar. To quote her post:

I made that list on my blog after wondering if I could, without really thinking, come up with 18 things I wanted right at that moment...Don’t worry about looking outward or #firstworldproblems. Don’t worry about seeming shallow. Consider this an inward exploration of what you want, deep down, without the pressures and outside influences that are usually clogging everything up. Maybe you’ll find out something about yourself you didn’t already know.

So here I go. Here's my list of 18 Things I want right this very moment. Written live. Let's see how this goes. Share your list on your blog too. And pass me the link so I can read.

1. A dog. Doesn't matter what breed.
2. Really, really long, voluminous hair.
3. A lipstick that lasts all day no matter how much you eat/talk/make out.
4. Someone to make out with.
5. The metabolic rate of a supermodel.
6. The ability to never gain weight.
7. Shoes that would actually fit my huge feet.
8. A time machine that would take me back to the 90s. Then I'd break it and never come back to the present.
9. Finish the entire Game of Thrones series.
10. Get George R R Martin to finish writing the series.
11. The ability to follow through on all the decisions I make in life.
12. The destruction of email so we could go back to writing letters again.
13. The ability to never, ever sweat no matter what.
14. A hair removal cream that kills the hair follicle forever so I never have to shave again.
15. A soft, sensual kiss.
16. The ability to let go and move on.
17. A trip to Spain.
18. The ability to be a better writer.