Confessions of a broken heart

Wikipedia: A broken heart (or heartbreak) is a common metaphor used to describe the intense psychological pain one feels after losing a loved one, through death, divorce, or other means as in breaking up with someone or having your partner move away.



Symptoms:

• A perceived tightness of the chest, similar to an anxiety attack
• Stomach ache and/or loss of appetite
• Partial or complete insomnia
• Anger
• Shock
• Nostalgia
• Apathy (loss of interest)
• Feelings of loneliness
• Feelings of hopelessness and despair
• Loss of self-respect and/or self-esteem
• Medical or psychological illness (e.g. depression)
• Suicidal thoughts (in extreme cases)
• Nausea
• Denial
• Fatigue
• The thousand-yard stare

The title of this blog entry may be a song sung by Lindsay Lohan, but it is also a feeling that I am going through currently.





What happens when you're in love, when you feel like being with the person forever, when you feel like nothing can go wrong -- but everything just falls down?

• You wake up with terrible heart ache, the kind that just wont go away.


• You'll stare at your phone for hours, wondering if he'll leave a message.


• You stare at the wall, mindlessly, blankly..with no thoughts coming to mind.


• You'll cry for hours and hours, till your eyes swell to the size of golf balls, and you can cry no more.


• You'll tell yourself you'll move on, when you know you cant.


• You'll be hopeful that it will all change, that he will tell you he misses you and wants to get back with you.


• You'll think it's just a bad dream, and you are waiting to wake up.


• You'll try to immerse yourself in work, but your attention always goes back to him.


• You'll feel like a part of your soul has been ripped apart, there is a feeling of emptiness.


• You're numb.


• You're lonely.


• You're sad.


• You're just not yourself.

How I wish breaking up was easy. For him, as well as for me.

Wait, if I am wishing for something, why not wish we never broke up at all?

I'm trying to move on. It's truly the hardest thing I've ever done. I wish it didn't happen. But it did..

I can't think of what to write anymore. I wish I knew. I wish.